The Lives of Lesser Known Fauna

The stag night beetle lives on lager and kebabs.

The black Scottish widow spider lives on a good pension.

The ant eloper lives on the run with his young bride. He is pursued by ant depressants.

The Colorado beetle lives in permanent envy of his wealthy cousin the El Dorado beetle.

Puzzled in Luton

They have made changes at Luton station. I passed through the ticket barrier as usual on my way to a meeting, following people ahead of me. I found myself at street level but on the opposite side of the street I normally found myself on. I re-traced my steps to see if I had taken a wrong turn. I had not. They had removed a bridge. Instead of going across and then down, I now had to go down and then across. It felt as though I was taking part in a surreal crossword puzzle, clearly without a clue. I was happier with the bridge.

Little Surfer Buoy

I have redefined what it is to be a surfer. This is my interpretation, honed to theoretical perfection in the frozen steppes of Northamptonshire and executed with acute embarrassment on the Cornish coast. It is an elegant equation that links expenditure of huge amounts of energy to a minimal amount of contact between surfer and surf board, a breakdown of synergy manifesting in the consumption of copious amounts of sea water and an inability to put on one's socks the following day.

I think the out of focus flag says it all.